Common Online Dating Misunderstandings
When people say that online casual dating is a bad idea, they usually base that opinion on very logical reasons, really.
The reason why you should trust me on this is that I married the man I dated online for a whole year. Both of us being from countries that don’t offer internet easily, and both of us being actually not financially “well-off”, we did not have web cams at home. We used to go everyday to internet cafes to be able to talk to each other.
The amount of negative feelings we caused each other through that year cannot be counted. Misunderstandings occurred almost every single day. It takes a lot to be able to hang on to an online relationship. You will find yourself always drifting from honesty in the relationship; flirting with other people only because you are angry and almost losing hope in the relationship.
Here is an idea about the misunderstandings you will most likely face in an online casual dating relationship – especially if it goes for a little too long:
Jealousy based on verbal diarrhea: There is always a difference between how people describe certain situations and incidents. Women in particular tend to be over-imaginative and include a little too many details in their story-telling. Of course, when the woman comes to tell about a story that includes a man, the whole matter turns disastrous. Although the fact would probably be that nothing of what really happened should cause any jealousy, the voice beyond the screen might be very deceiving. This is one very common misunderstanding especially when the woman is a writer with a very wild imagination like me, i.e. almost a psycho.
Tone mix-up: Many times does one part of the couple feel like the other part is speaking with a “sharp and annoying” tone. Most of the times, the person with the weird tone is only tired after work, had just waken up, just had a fight with mom. But when the relationship is faceless, so many things are taken too personally because the truth is you’re very scared during each and every step of the way.
Sexual needs not met: Although the fact that a woman can wait longer than a man can is usually true, most of the times this causes confusion to both sides of the relationship, especially when the man has women throwing themselves at him or the woman has men drooling over her. The question of “do I have the right to satisfy my sexual needs with someone else for the moment?” will always crawl up your mind, and the real problem lies in the possibility of a disagreement on the answer to that question. Put in mind that you have to reach some sort of a deal or compromise regarding this matter.
The almost non-existing partner: Through your online relationship, you will probably meet many other people who are around you in real life, you will like many, have crush on some, feel like some could be the perfect match for you. And sometimes, you tend to forget that there’s the online partner who you are virtually committed to. Even when you remember that partner, you will always wonder “But this person is almost non-existing, I don’t really know anything about this person but what he/she says. This other person I like is real in flesh and blood, I can see, hear, and feel him/her. What’s the right choice?”
Those are some of the most common misunderstanding and confusions you face in an online relationship.
The truth of the matter is, it is always best to make the “online” phase last shortest as you could. Unless your partner is miles away over seas and you can’t find a way to get together, then set a real date as soon as possible because online relationships are – as much as they are magical- very hurtful.
